How to Tell an Activist Judge from a Non Activist Judge

Hey you there. Yes you, the one in the camouflage face paint, kneeling in the shrubs cradling a sniper rifle across the street from the Supreme Court of Canada. I know you’re eager to thin the ranks of the Activist Judges but they can be awfully difficult to tell apart just from looking at them. So here are a few ways to easily identify an activist judge. You wouldn't want to shoot a Non- Activist judge by mistake would you? Who would strike down gay marriage then?

An Activist Judge can be identified by simply going through the following checklist:
- continually rules against prayer in schools. Also rules against forced prayer on buses on the way to school and on the way home from school.
- continually strikes down laws passed by elected officials. Particularly laws passed by conservative elected officials? (Why shouldn't you be allowed to lock up suspected illegals in your basement while waiting for the authorities to arrive?)
- continually rules in favour of abortions. Even in cases of rape and incest. And pregnancy brought on by alien abductions. Alien babies are god’s creatures too … unless Satan turns out to be an alien. Better hold off on this one till we’re 100% sure.
- favours gay men having sex on your lawn. In front of your children. (It’s the next logical step after legalized gay marriage people. It’s all right there in the bible. The page number escapes me. Look it up)
- thinks we evolved from apes (puhleezz!) instead the much more logical and biblical explanation of being created by an all knowing, all seeing invisible being 6000 years ago. Also refuses to accept women created from Adam’s rib. Plant a rib of your own in your backyard and see what happens. I grew an entire orchard of women with only half a rib from a female raccoon I found dead on the roof. Just add water and a lot of prayer.
- takes the Charter of Rights and Freedoms literally. How literally can you take a document written by man and not by man through the hand of god?

Non Activist judges are easy to spot. Unlike Activist Judges they let their own moral code tell them what's right and wrong. They don't let themselves be bullied by the Constitution or Charter of Rights and Freedoms. They've got balls. They want to get right in there: into your bedrooms, into your uteruses and into your very head and tell you what's right and wrong. God Bless them all.
Good hunting!